Wednesday, August 29, 2007

just had my best celebrity sighting ever...

george lopez!!!!

okay, not really the best. this is one of my hilarious 'opposite' jokes that darkpony hates.

people who annoy me today

tourists in matching outfits, that's who!

hey, studs! you going to a yankees game today? oh, i couldn't tell by all of that yankees gear you've piled on. jersey? check. cap? check. and you? are you going to carry that huge camera all day? there is such a thing as a camera bag, you know. oh, you're too macho to carry a bag? wait, you and your two friends are dressed exactly alike...

hey, ladies! oh, how clever! you're all wearing matching t-shirts that say "from old york to new york." at least you chose black t-shirts, so you will blend in with us new yorkers who are known for only wearing all black. classy!

Friday, August 24, 2007

you know what drives me batty?

when people write in their gawker stalkings and defamer sightings like this:

Saw Jemaine from Flight of the Conchords walking south on Allen St. Pretty regular looking hipster, but surprisingly good-looking. Wanted to yell MERRRMAAAIIIDD at him but resisted...

and this:

Spotted the indie queen Parker Posey picking up her small fluffy dog from Biscuits and Bath in the West Village at 6:30pm. I resisted the urge to ask if Beatrice had her "busy bee".

good thing you resisted cuz you'd look like an ass, a-hole!

oh, i was just trying to find this to no avail, but there was this blog that listed like 7 signs that you aren't as smart as you think you are. one of them was like, "you quote lines from movies in conversation," which made me chuckle because i wholeheartedly agree. omg, you watch tv! awesome! do you also like pizza? me too!

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

i'm slitting my wrists right now...

"Bustos, a 34-year-old project manager for a telecommunications company, said he had not read any books in the last year and would rather spend time in his backyard pool."

isn't this the most depressing quote ever? it's from this cnn.com article about americans and their book reading habits.

p.s. god, i bet it's an above-ground pool...

people who annoy me today

hey, mark twain! guess what? you're not the only one on these stairs going into the subway as you proceed to shake the water off of your umbrella behind you without looking to see if anyone might be there. one wouldn't want to get his precious cream suit and big, white mustache wet, would he now?

Friday, August 10, 2007

i survived Y2K in this building!

so, i used to live in this building (pre-beauty addiction banner and pre-ugly condos surrounding it), and it was the last hold out on bayard street/mccarren park. it's just been torn down. darkpony and i found our little babies, pony and rabbit, in an empty lot where that green monstrosity is now. they used to eat baked ziti there! anyway, i got kicked out of this building for bringing in those cats, though the first floor had birds, and the second floor apartment had a dog. i'm still pissed at manny the landlord and a few others involved with that eviction! so is darkpony, since i had to move in with him. many years later, he is still wondering when the cats and i are going to find our own place. ha ha!

my dream home!

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

should have eaten at wendy's!

i ate at mcdonald's for lunch, and now my teeth hurt. weird!

Monday, August 06, 2007

what you lookin' at, condi? (said in the voice of arnold drummond)

gosh! that ben kingsley really is like the best actor!

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

shut up!

so yesterday i walked past this girl showing a dress she just bought to her friend and saying, "can you believe this dress was only $15?!?"

ummm, yeah...cuz you pulled the dress out of a forever 21 bag. duh!