dear chad lowe,

buck up, young buck. we all know that this isn't the worst thing to happen in your life. you've always been playing second fiddle to that beautiful brother, especially in class, of yours. that sex scandal of his must have made you happy, but then he got a second chance with the west wing. but then he screwed that one up big time when he thought that he could go be mr. big shot and have his own tv show called dr. vegas or something.
anyway, let's get back on track. who was this hilary swank before you met her? that's right, trailer trash. you were the bigger star who took her under your wing. when you died of aids on life goes on and then won an emmy, she was being fired from playing steve sanders' girlfriend on 90210. who, other than shannen doherty, gets fired from 90210? a bad actress, not a bad girl, that's who. just because she's won two academy awards for the only two movies she has ever been in means nothing. she only won because she had to play boys in both movies, same with gwyneth in that shakespeare in love, or when jody played that mentally challenged nell. what i'm trying to get at is that the academy awards suck. big time.
hilary is a total wet blanket, right? i knew it, and her teeth are ginormous. my goodness. it looks like you still have that baby soft complexion, so keep moisturizing no matter how depressed you are. you don't want to lose that because of old hil, do you?
okay, i've got to run, but i really hope this letter has cheered you up.

take it easy,
hd

p.s. there are plenty fish in the sea who have no rising stars, so chew on that for a bit.